*This post is not meant to delegitimize women who are wives and mothers-it means not every woman needs to think about matrimony and motherhood once out of the womb. This is one lady’s perspective on being overly ambitious: Me.*
Double Standard As A Female Future Lawyer: Why is it that a guy wants a “smart girl” and yet they seem turned off by a sweet, kind Christian lady who wants to be a lawyer (not looking to marry a lawyer but actually becoming a lawyer)!?! Also, consider the double standard of being a lawyer: When a man says he is/is going to be a lawyer, women tend to fall in line to get the chance with him. When a woman says she is/is going to be a lawyer, the line is a desert. WHY IS THAT!?!
Funny Looks: The funny looks I get when I say what I am studying. “You’re too nice to be a lawyer.” “Really!?! A lawyer?” or the occasional “Oh.” It is as if African-American women are not supposed to be a lawyer. We are not second class citizens. We have choices and opportunities to be more than the invisibles. QUIT LOOKING AT MY CAREER CHOICE AS IF I SHOULD BE A STRAIGHT, WHITE MALE.
College Woes: Throughout college, I wanted to date or at least be in a relationship with someone who understood my dreams. To me, the Christian circles I associated with seemed to think I was crazy. Christian guys seemed to be turned off by me. Yes, I want to be a wife and mom but I want to be a lawyer. My dreams did not seem valid to most of them. So I had to learn to accept myself and I hope that a Godly man could come along.
But don’t cry for me Argentina!!! Mama B is good.
I get the same, surprised looks and I still repulse men. There may be respect from the male species but I am not their type. And that is ok. Life is still good. I refuse to be limited and bullied to be less than just because I have more melanin in my skin and have “extra dreams.” I have learned to accept Bianca and allow myself to grow into my God-given purpose. I know amazing women who raise children, work, and continue to push the boundaries, Women should not be boxed into societal gender roles. We should be who we want to be.
Call me weird and crazy but I am Bianca, future esquire. With every day that passes, I polish and transform into the woman God designed me to be. To tell you the truth, I like what I see. If you don’t believe me, just watch.