Life has a way of twisting and turning your focus, direction, and perspective on life. I was convicted in a sermon message about my own bitterness in my life. The pastor was talking from the LOVE Chapter (e.g. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5) about how “love keeps no record of wrongs.” He used that passage to highlight about how love does not have bitterness.
Bitterness is defined as exhibiting intense animosity or marked by cynicism and rancor.
The pastor talked about how bitterness can transform and alter your outcome. Bitterness turns into complaining, complaining turns into doubt, and doubt turns into a lack of focus on your future/destiny.
As I sat in my chair listening, I really thought to myself, “Am I bitter?” The truth is I was and did not realize it. I was bitter. I was complaining. I was doubting too. As I have written before, I was living at home, second failed attempt at the Bar, and just stuck. I was trying to function but still had this dark bitterness that made me feel helpless, like the world was laughing at me. I was a failure and a fool.
After church, I confessed to mom that I was bitter about everything going on. My mom and sister agreed that I would sulk in that bitterness and carry it with me. TALK ABOUT A WAKEUP CALL.
I really let it go too far.
But you know what? The pastor stated that God can take that bitterness and turn it into something sweet. He will give us His sweet presence, His peace. But the thing is: I had to keep the past in the past. It happened but I cannot dwell and live there. I need to move forward. Yes, life does not go as planned but God has something sweeter ahead.
I truly wrestled with that. I had to look into my heart and let go of what happened to me. Yes, I failed the Bar twice. Yes, life did not go as planned. Yes, I am living at home, trying to find work, and helping around more. BUT, God does not discount what I have been through. Actually, He is using it for something sweeter.
The Bible says “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!”- Psalm 34:8
God is good all the time. The Enemy is working overtime but God works ALL the time.
God is working it out but you and I cannot live in the bitterness of the past. Easier said than done but it’s true. You cannot move forward with bitterness. Yes, life can derail you but you cannot give into it. You can acknowledge your past but DON’T LIVE IN IT.
It takes God’s daily strength and power to wake me up in the morning. I can’t do it by my own power. Ask God for that power to move forward. Ask every day, every minute, every hour of the day. Bitterness eats you up alive. You can’t let it steal your joy.
Be better, not bitter.