Blissful Reasons Why I Could Never Be The Black Bachelorette

Blissful Reasons Why I Could Never Be The Black Bachelorette

636307302514747894-146144-0177So I was intrigued. The first African-American Bachelorette made her debut on primetime television. I have never watched the Bachelor/Bachelorette series but I made an exception. While turned on by the beautiful male specimen, I also thought about Rachel, the Bachelorette. I could never do what she has decided to do: To catapult into love by picking a guy from a group of strangers in a matter of months.

Here are some reasons why I could never be the Black Bachelorette:

  1. I have a group of men surrounding me and wanting my attention. I love men. I am an extrovert. But 31 men surrounding me would make me claustrophobic.
  2. I am too awkward for TV. I have to express my quirky, awkward self  to a guy on national television. NO WAY!
  3. I do not like being alone with a guy. Weird, I know but let me explain. Things like  “Hey, can I steal you away?” “Let’s go out and talk.” or a guy pulling me or taking my hand and making me go with him. I do not function like that. I need witnesses around me and public moments before I can trust being alone with a guy.
  4. My heart is one organ so I can’t split it to every guy on the show. Too many men to keep up with.  I do not know how to juggle men. Some girls consider that a talent. I do not know how to serial date so yeah…
  5. I am traditional. You have to work for the benefits of me. The physical aspects will not be instant; I need to be comfortable with you and really have a connection with you. Kissing comes after several dates, not the first date. Meeting my family and important people in my life is a big step. I date for marriage not for a fling. A ring means access to privacy in the bedroom. I don’t give myself easily to men.
  6. I don’t function well with heartbreak. No one does but I am dedicated and trusting. I am very sensitive. I think of Proverbs 4:23-Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. So I don’t give my heart to anyone.

So, you will not see me on the Bachelor or Bachelorette..sorry ya’ll. I will fall in love the old-fashion way.  I am smart (future lawyer), kind, loyal, creative, loveable Christ-IMG_1064follower. Call me crazy but I guard my feelings and heart. Good luck to Rachel and her path to love. People fall in love in different ways but traditional is the way I roll. Maybe there is someone out there for me or not. Either way, I will get a dog. But loving myself, God, and the people who love me for me is my path of love.

Catapult

Blissfully,

Bianca

A Queen Is A Champion of Her Empire

A Queen Is A Champion of Her Empire

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I love what this quote represents.  My mom always reminds me to rely on God and myself.  She always encourages me to keep chasing and fighting for my dreams. A man is not the sum total of my life. A man’s presence is an addition to my empire.

A champion does not wait for someone to carry them. A champion works hard, stays humble, and keeps fighting. A Queen does not need a king to make her empire great. She is a champion in her own right. A Queen only needs her HEAVENLY KING and herself.

Colossians 3:23-24  “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,  since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”

Champion

Blissfully,

Bianca

An Ode to the Queens

An Ode to the Queens

You are strong.

You are beautiful.

You are wise.

You are defined by the Creator who calls you Beloved.

You are married, single, engaged, widowed, and divorced. 

You are Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, and Multiracial. 

You cover a spectrum of amazing careers.

You break ceilings.

You march for the cause.

You are a role model.

Humanity was birthed through you.

You take care of  your Kingdom from sun-up to sun-down, and through the night.

You are a Queen.

Don’t let anyone tell you less.

You are valid and worthy of life, love, and peace.

You are a Queen.

 

Blissfully,

Bianca

Believe In Yourself & Don’t Be Nervous

Believe In Yourself & Don’t Be Nervous

You know that feeling where you are on the brink of something great but you get so nervous at the thought of the change. If you are anything like me, it is hard to change scenery. I have been in school for 8 years and I have become acclimated to my bubble. Next year, I will no longer be a student. I will be in a different scenery of life.

Is it weird to be nervous about what could be? Because I feel that way.

But me being nervous stunts my growth. Women have been told no too many times. The powerful women I look up to had moments of nervousness. Going against the norm was not easy but they stood tall and proud.

Believe it or not, whether directly or indirectly, I have been rejected, made fun of, and belittled for having dreams. Sometimes I get nervous about how great I can be. But I also believe that I can do great things. Beiwomen-empowerment-quotes-12ng nervous is a natural emotion but know that you cannot stay in your nervous bubble. Dare to live on the wild side. History was not made by following the norm. It was made by stepping out and fighting the nervous societal pressures.

So I encourage all ladies to not let the nervous societal pressures stop you from achieving greatness. Keep up the good fight. Don’t take no for an answer. Keep being you. Keep being amazing human beings. 

Nervous

Blissfully,

Bianca

Mama B Struggles Too

Mama B Struggles Too

via Daily Prompt: Desire

So I had a moment. I got into a very heated debate with my mom and sister about weddings (my sister and I are not engaged…so don’t worry). I was talking about how I want to plan the perfect wedding and that I am ok with a year-long engagement. My mom and sister grossly disagreed and felt no more than a six month engagement  (crazy to me)!!!

A little background about me: I am a type A personality. I like things done a certain way. I have to touch, feel, and approve of everything. I am a planner. To-do lists are my motivation and are my assistant to life.  I make a mental pros and cons list and repeat the list in my mind several times before making major decisions. I know, I am crazy…

At a point in the conversation, I felt attacked and hurt. And my mom (the woman who knows me very well) said, Bianca, what does God say about worry and being anxious?  I paraphrased with Philippians 4:6-7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

My mom, then comforted me with these words: Bianca, it’s ok to plan but don’t forget to give your plans to God. That is a tough pill to swallow.

Like any human being, I want beautiful things in my life. I do want to get married. I do want children. I do want a career with benefits and health insurance. I do want to own a home. I do want etc, etc, etc. There is so much that I desire to have but sometimes it seems like I am stuck where I am. My type A, psycho, OCD self wants to tell God how to plan my life and remind Him “Hey God, you know I want these things right!?! When are you going to do them? My biological clock is ticking and I am getting anxious.” Wrong Approach…

I am reminded of Psalm 37. I encourage you to read it. I have to keep reminding myself that I need to give those desires to God. I can’t make my desires happen on my own. I need the guidance, protection, and grace of God. Like I said, it is a tough pill to swallow. But it is a constant reminder that my path is a divine part of God’s great landscape. Where I am is where I am meant to be. I can actively be Bianca in my daily life. It does not mean that I disregard my hopes and dreams. It’s just that I need to be content in the now and pray for those desires. God is not blind to prayer. He wants to hear my desires and thoughts. But He also wants my obedience. So that’s what I am learning. Mama B struggles too.

Desire

Blissfully,

Bianca

Believe with Bianca

Believe with Bianca

she-persisted

So in honor of Women’s History Month, I wanted to encourage women from all walks of life and various backgrounds. And also, men can be included too.

All of us have had someone say “No,”  “You can’t do it,” “You are too delicate for something like that,” “You’re too nice to be a lawyer.” I know these comments because I have heard those phrases and more from family and my peers. To persist means to continue firmly or obstinately in an opinion or a course of action in spite of difficulty, opposition, or failure. I know many women who have suffered and sacrificed so much to be where they are. I have endured direct and indirect hurtful comments and setbacks in my life. There will always be people, circumstances, and things that could cause you to give up. But you know what? Greater that is in me, than He who is in the world.  Be brave. Be bold. Persist. Whatever fire you have to go through, persist, push through, and God will take care of the rest.

Be the woman who nevertheless persists.

Blissfully,

Bianca